Tea Party Ramblings

The Jew-run liberal media won’t run this story because it doesn’t further their political agenda, and Fox News won’t carry it because it’s true, but over the weekend, I discovered an amazing story that the world needs to know.

It seems that a museum in Memphis had an exhibit called “Dinosaurs Live” that featured mechanical dinosaurs.  The exhibit offers patrons an opportunity to experience firsthand the size and scope of dinosaurs when they roamed the planet.  A family from Ellis Chapel, Arkansas, devout Tea Party activists and members of the Mt. Zion Missionary Baptist Church of Ellis Chapel, heard about the exhibit and decided to brave the dangers of the big city to see for themselves.  When the family arrived at the museum and learned that the dinosaurs were in fact mechanical and not “live,” they demanded a full refund.

“We came down here expecting to see us some real life diney-sores,” explains Cletus McOnetooth.  “That there advertising is misleading.”

When a museum spokesperson attempted to explain that dinosaurs had been extinct for millions of years, McOnetooth became incensed.

“That’s plumb impossible.  Everbody knows the world’s only six thousand year old.  All them scientists are just puppets of Satan trying to confuse the minds of our children folk.”

The irate McOnetooth family text messaged their Tea Party militia brothers, and a protest quickly formed outside the museum.  Protesters marched with signs like: “Musiems are for Queers” “God Hates Queers” “Stop Taxing Diney-sores” “Only Queers Tax Diney-Sores” were prominent in the protest.

“If we have to, we’ll fire bomb this musiem and overthrow the government,” one protester said.  “We know this socialist regime just doesn’t want us to see the diney-sores cause it proves they’re lying about how old the earth is to pass this socialist healthcare.  We won’t stand for it anymore.”

“Don’t know why we keep getting labelled as racists,” another protester said.  “Not none of us have any problem with each other.  We all get along just fine.  It’s them blacks and Jews and queers that keep causing all the problems.”

Fortunately for all, the protest quickly disbanded when it was learned that professional wrestling was about to start in the convention center.

“We came down here to see them diney-sores,” Cletus McOnetooth said.  “But instead we got to see wrastling, so we feel it’s all part of God’s plan.  He sure does work in mysterious ways.”

One thought on “Tea Party Ramblings”

  1. And, the late Bill Hicks. (Btw, Bill Hicks was good friends with Sam Kinison. They used to ride together while performing shows in Houston. So you should know, this is NSFW.)

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